Have you ever feel that you're trying to talk to somebody and that you're afraid that the other person doesn't want to talk to you or care about you? When you have this unwanted feeling inside of you, what do you do?

I've been telling myself to shut up all these while because I have this feeling that tells me that once I talked, I won't be getting any response or get a blade-slash-to-the-heart. Trying to hold back what've care for just because of this fear that I felt. Fearing that someone will get irritate, fear that it will lead to no friendship. Even if I am that person, I would feel the same especially when you think that you have a lot of things to do and you got no time to concertrate on relationship problems.

There's another fear that I felt is the fear of talking that will lead to argument. I tried to avoid myself giving away reaction that will rise people's anger but eventhough I tried to avoid in anyway I can including keeping my mouth close still, I end up in a furious situation where both of us are blinded by anger. At the end, I'll cry on my bed, waiting for someone to save me from myself.

I've been trying to speak up and try to say 'Hi' to anyone but usually end up fearing to get no response. One way to know whether the other person care about you is to simply observe whether he/she greet you once in a while. If no, not even a phone call, or an email add, or a simply 'hi', then, there's a little chance that I think that person really cares. Maybe the other person is busy of other things, but then, even the busiest person in the world would have a resting time, don't they? Don't they think about us? Maybe it's is depend on how important are we to them. All these tells me to keep my mouth close coz of fears.

Maybe I'm afraid to engaged in relationship and afraid to get hurt because I've been hurt many times. This wounded heart of mine still haven't heal from before. It get hurt more than it's healed. Right now, I won't want to do anything because I couldn't take it anymore.