Torn Between Two lovers
I dreamt a very strange dream last night. Ya, another strange dream. But this time... it is something that I don't want see or feel.
From the dream, I realized that my love life is going to be like this forever and there's not other way to turn back. I realized that I couldn't have another option to choice the partners of my life eventhough I might have a crush on someone else who might be able to give me a better life in future. Because of that dream, I realise all these but I couldn't do anything else because my future road of life and the reality is this road. The road that I'm using now.
It's hard to accept the fact that I might be in love with someone else besides the one that I'm in love right now. I'm afraid it will happen to me and I don't even dare to imagine how it feel like. The one that I in love right now is only Ryan and only he will be with me in my future. Because of these dreams, it make me see the consequences fall in love with somebody else which was not what I want.
That dream left me with guilt and fear. I realize something, I'm afraid of something, but I want something which its impossible for me to get it because I have something that are by fate stays with me forever that make that something chose to go far away from me.
=.=" if you don't understand, then it is better not to understand coz I dont' understand it either.