Keeping...
Today, I was hoping that he will call me, but no...I called. Yet, feel like there's nothing to talk about. I was hoping maybe we can meet one of these three days but unfortunately no... He's busy.
All of the sudden, I felt a hard invisible pressure pressing into my chest and I'm became speechless. My tears was going to flow... but I walked to the living room where my sis is playing with her little toys while watching American Funniest Video. I just force myself to laugh and smile in front of her while I keep this feeling away from her.
Sometimes, I'm just feeling weak, hoping to share my sadness and tears with someone whom I trust. I wonder if he can be there, whenever I needed him.
It make me sad, because nobody... can be there for me when I need someone to hug and a shoulder to cry on. That's why, I'm envy those who has the one who is there for you especially those who has their mothers in their life.
You know what... I think I'll just go to sleep...
